So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
