At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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