He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I currently don't understand fingers.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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