it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
