im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
