I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
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