So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
