God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
drinking out of a sandbucket again
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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