Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize