Can Purell be used as lube?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize
