Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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