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So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
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