I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
