it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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