we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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