If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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