So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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