Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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