Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
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you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
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he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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