i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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