What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
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