"it" just moved
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
