what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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