paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Panties = found
Randomize
