his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Randomize
