Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Randomize
