I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
