Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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