Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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