All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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