You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
