my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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