I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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