I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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