All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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