would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize