What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
