I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment