I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
My penis needs a shock collar
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
