y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
