Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Randomize
