mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
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Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
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I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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