Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize