turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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