ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
