Texts From Last Night

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  (212): View more from New York

  brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp

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  (212): brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp http://tfl.nu/bier
  Replies (41) Good night (1860) Bad night (12854)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings

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  (206): A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings http://tfl.nu/86t1
  Replies (23) Good night (3378) Bad night (753)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food

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  (720): Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food http://tfl.nu/f7o2
  Replies (121) Good night (7718) Bad night (1776)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...

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  (513): I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten... http://tfl.nu/iblb
  Replies (50) Good night (3315) Bad night (5944)
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  (941): View more from Florida

  how did the keg end up in the top bunk?

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  (941): how did the keg end up in the top bunk? http://tfl.nu/zpng
  Replies (11) Good night (2882) Bad night (768)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.

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  (201): Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them. http://tfl.nu/ciek
  Replies (20) Good night (3221) Bad night (1055)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.

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  (206): She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers. http://tfl.nu/uzdb
  Replies (3) Good night (2503) Bad night (835)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine

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  (248): Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine http://tfl.nu/ph8k
  Replies (3) Good night (2047) Bad night (649)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...

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  (603): oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar... http://tfl.nu/mqjx
  Replies (12) Good night (714) Bad night (1463)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang

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  (412): I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang http://tfl.nu/dtxk
  Replies (20) Good night (2065) Bad night (814)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later

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  (732): Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later http://tfl.nu/qouw
  Replies (4) Good night (1025) Bad night (946)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?

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  (423): Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina? http://tfl.nu/kprk
  Replies (5) Good night (1124) Bad night (619)
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  (707): View more from California

  New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.

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  (707): New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses. http://tfl.nu/6j5u
  Replies (2) Good night (412) Bad night (904)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.

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  (660): He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker. http://tfl.nu/eb59
  Replies (5) Good night (843) Bad night (403)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!

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  (505): Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals! http://tfl.nu/xa1f
  Replies (1) Good night (232) Bad night (112)

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