Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.

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  (248): the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick. http://tfl.nu/f71t
  Replies (2) Good night (831) Bad night (1081)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ

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  (206): My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ http://tfl.nu/st4o
  Replies (23) Good night (1062) Bad night (1730)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners

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  (678): Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners http://tfl.nu/cs50
  Replies (32) Good night (4370) Bad night (640)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"

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  (240): Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug" http://tfl.nu/c6tu
  Replies (22) Good night (5968) Bad night (1174)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.

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  (248): If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme. http://tfl.nu/8vj2
  Replies (12) Good night (8014) Bad night (1524)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"

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  (606): I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?" http://tfl.nu/ecul
  Replies (56) Good night (1143) Bad night (5207)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores

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  (609): it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores http://tfl.nu/lmvr
  Replies (10) Good night (3464) Bad night (986)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal

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  (281): Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal http://tfl.nu/lnon
  Replies (20) Good night (3993) Bad night (1118)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.

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  (517): Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise. http://tfl.nu/o3um
  Replies (12) Good night (3590) Bad night (1099)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.

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  (832): No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin. http://tfl.nu/1p6f
  Replies (16) Good night (998) Bad night (2317)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy

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  (614): making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy http://tfl.nu/o6e5
  Replies (7) Good night (3203) Bad night (837)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan

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  (631): he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan http://tfl.nu/sol0
  Replies (19) Good night (2029) Bad night (966)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.

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  (914): Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game. http://tfl.nu/xx77
  Replies (15) Good night (3367) Bad night (840)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you

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  (609): I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you http://tfl.nu/6554
  Replies (3) Good night (788) Bad night (441)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation

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  (734): I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation http://tfl.nu/fh6w
  Replies (6) Good night (590) Bad night (505)

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