Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
