idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Randomize
