She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize