xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
