I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
